When you just stop, and then invite God to show you whatever He wants to show you – things that once weren’t so clear become very clear. The deeper I went into the stillness and the quiet of my burnout inspired Sabbath with God, the clearer it became to me that I didn’t really own anything. Nothing I enjoyed in my life was enjoyed because I “owned” or had totally mastery over the whole process of making those things happen for myself. That which was in my life, wasn’t there solely because of me. I realized there were so many other factors and players involved in my ability to access the enjoyment of what I thought I “owned.” It also became clearer that I had no control over how long or how much I would enjoy any of it. Even if I did routine maintenance and regular service on my stuff, I still didn’t control when my stuff would break. It was sobering to realize that the bank accounts, retirement assets, home, and car that I fell back on to feel emotionally secure on my bad days, were really not in my control. I was not an owner of anything, but a steward of what God was sharing with me as His caretaker for as long as He saw fit.
Here’s a fun exercise. Make a list of the stuff that you “own,” and then try to assess how much that stuff came under your “ownership” all because you had sole mastery over how that stuff came under your control. Finally ask yourself, “What do I actually own?”